Tuesday, April 1, 2008

My Celebrity Interview

After careful deliberation, 29 google searches, and a gallon and a half of Captain Morgan Private Stock, I've decided to play along with Ann Thrope (or whatever her new name is) over at Color Me Complicated. It's a happy little site. Frought with ponies, rainbows, crayons, and F-bombs.
Fun for the whole family. Check it out.

Here goes-

1. Your best friend is cheating on his wife. You think he's making a big mistake, but he's your BEST friend, so you keep your thoughts to yourself. Then, his wife calls you for advice. Assume that you admire and respect her. She asks you point blank if her husband is having an affair. What do you say?

I say attaboy! You only get one go-round on this big blue rock, so you gotta grab all the nookie you can get!
Actually that's a lie. But, would I rat out my best friend? No way.

2. Your children are extremely important to you. For the purposes of this question, assume your ex has taken you back to court and managed to get herself named the custodial parent. She then informs you she is moving across the country. What would you do? Would you pull up stakes and follow? Or simply wait for your visitation?

-AINT GONNA HAPPEN- (if you ever met "the beast" you'd realize how far off this question is)

3. You've been asked to be photographed for the cover of a romance novel. Give the name of the novel, the pose you like best, and what, if anything, you are wearing.
Being the hopeless romantic that consumes my innermost being...yeah right.
I'd have to call it 'Damons Deepest Desires- the laundry ain't foldin itself'-volume II-
I'd probably be posed in a bean bag chair, remote in hand, clad in my Darth Vader costume with gentle breezes flowing through my robes, like the tradewinds at a goat farm in eastern West Virginia. My image would be surrounded by scantily clad women, offering me roast beef sandwiches, washing my dishes, and scrubbing my floors.

8 comments:

Miss Ann Thrope said...

OH MY GAWD, you make me laugh. HA! Scantily clad women doing your dishes? THAT'S your vision for a romance novel?

hahahahahaha....

Wait...

*scantily clad MEN doing MY dishes...* ooh, yeah, baby... that IS HAWT!!!

VE said...

Hah. Good ones. But seriously dude, that last one...have you been over to my place again?

April said...

hey I'm with you on the feeding me sammiches(although mine would be those cute little finger sammys) and doing my laundry and dishes part! I'm not sure anything else would turn me on more.

Rickey Henderson said...

A capitol blog. Rickey stumbled upon it while frequenting Leigh's blog. Rickey recommends that you check out his blog, Riding With Rickey pronto for a good dose of sports humor and rampant fuckwittery.

Ashley Ladd said...

Ha ha on the romance novel cover. Like it.

Bee said...

Hmmm... I think I've read that book! Is it a coincidence the initials of the book would be DDD??

elasticwaistbandlady said...

Thank you for leaving out any mention of you holding your "pulsating light saber" in your hand while posing.

THopgood said...

LMAO! It's really quite enlightening to read thing from a man's perspective...and funny as hell!