HOW COLD IS IT

It is 31 degrees in Largo Florida.
IT'S 31 DEGREES IN LARGO FLORIDA.
Read it again.
Thirty-one. Trente y uno.
31 is for ice cream flavors and Montana summers.
It's just wrong for describing Fla temps.
So very wrong.
This morning I saw a car with a Canadian license plate heading north. (I hear Sasketchewan is having a 34 degree heat wave.)
I think there is a rock in my boot, but I'm afraid to check. I may find that my pinky toe has frozen and broken off.
Someone call Al Gore, global warming has officially ended.