Monday, January 21, 2008

DREAM ON

I am happy to join with you here today in what will hopefully bring sanity to parents across this great nation of ours.

For I too, have a dream.

I have a dream that one day Kool-aid spilled from the glass of a toddler, will not stain my carpet. So as to ease the relationship between clumsy youngsters and rug-scrubbing fathers.

I have a dream that Crayola crayons will not melt in my dryer, ending forever, the practice of testing Daddys' pocket checking abilities at laundry time.

My dream is for the future leaders of our country to eat their vegetables, without the fuss, so we may never again speak the words, "then just sit there, until you do."

I dream of baby-sitters by the hundreds, lining up at my door, to tend to my children, free of charge, so Daddy can get drunk at a hockey game and scream at the referees.

I have dreampt of a time when the mutant kids next door, will lay down their water balloons, and never again plot an unprovoked attack on my newly washed truck.

I dream of a day when day-care centers do not close for every holiday on the calendar that I am not off of work for. Causing family and friends who do have the day off, to spend it with my kids.

I have a dream of barefoot children, not biting their toenails.
And of walking barefoot myself, into my sons room, without the m-f ing scream that can only come from stepping on a matchbox car or a lego.

But alas, I awake from my slumber only to find it is only a dream.

Happy Martin Luther King Jr. Day.

6 comments:

Politically Blonde said...

I have the same dreams, and don't even have any children. Strange how that works...

allofus said...

I dream of kids that wil listen when spoken to. And speak when listened to.

DrowseyMonkey said...

"without the m-f ing scream that can only come from stepping on a matchbox car or a lego."

lmao....all great reasons why I dont' have kids.

SuburbanCorrespondent said...

Dream on!

Trouble said...

You need to submit your blog to humorblogs.com. You are way funnier than 90% of the blogs on that site. ;)

SherryTex said...

Dream this dream. Then find every permanent marker and throw it out.

Refuse to buy red or purple colored beverages until all children are out of the house.

Invest in resolve carpet cleaner and Mr. Clean Wall Cleaning Bricks.